As my daughter lies in bed a few days after the operation to remove a tumor in her brain, I consider the question addressed by restless parents, philosophers, religious personages, bloggers, artists, debaters of various attraction philosophies, and those much more wise and spiritual than I …
Does everything happen for a reason?
Did we attract this cyst into her our lives by feeling the wrong feelings, by thinking or vibrating or focusing in some negative cancerous way instead of permeating health and vitality?
Are we being punished for something we did in a past life, for drinking that margarita before I knew I was pregnant, for exposing her to too much iPhone usage, for sleeping too close to the wifi node?
Is there a lesson, a grand master plan, a purpose for which we were sent this challenge, by beings greater and wiser than ourselves?
I think not.
My daughter’s brain tumor did not happen for a reason.
Sometimes, bad shit just happens.
The God that I believe in isn’t an asshole.
God doesn’t say hey, look at that beautiful 5 year old girl (the most happy, creative, and empathetic person I have ever met) and say to himself, let’s see what she does with this cosmic kick in the ass, or let’s send her this ultimate life coaching assignment to help her fulfill her grand purpose in life.
Bad things don’t happen for a reason.
It is up to us to give reasons to our bad happenings.
It is up to us to create meaning from our shit.
I have learned how to ask for help. I have learned what’s really important. I have learned how blessed I am. I have learned who my true friends are. I have learned how many people love me. I have learned how the amazingness people really are capable of. I have learned how small the world is. I have learned how to live in the moment.
I’m sure my daughter will give her own meaning to this happening. Some of it may be churning in her head right now, and some of it may manifest itself decades in the future.
Now I leave it up to you.
I won’t tell you what to take away from this post, what to learn from your witnessing this happening, what meaning to find in your own shit.
But I ask you …
Do you want to lament how much the shit sucks? Do you ask why me, how did this happen, who sent this to us? Do you whirl in the stickiness of this isn’t fair?
Or do you choose to take a grand leap of spirit?
Do you choose to move from asking into action, from obsession into being? From grand lamentations into embracing exactly where you are, what blessings you have … and flow forward into the great, amazing, delicious unknown?
It’s your choice.
As for me … I choose to give meaning to my shit.
I choose to see the awesome. I choose to leap.
#thatisall
I'm Elizabeth Potts Weinstein, an attorney, mom, writer, and explorer.