These are the people I found.

The first person is telling a story.

Persons of the first travel in packs. You can hear these pods of two, three, seven coming from a hundred feet away, their excited voices piercing through the branches as they connect with each other via their histories, opinions, stories of the hunt or the gather.

They share about the best way to baste a turkey, or how much they should have invested in Apple stock, or how their neighbor with three kids was just diagnosed with multiple sclerosis and isn’t that terrible and this is how she has been coping with it.

Yes, at this moment they are walking on a trail.

But they could be instantly transported into Stanford Shopping Center or the neighborhood Starbucks or my best friend’s kitchen, and the conversation would be the same.

They are not really here in the woods.

The persons of the first are in a past.

The second person I meet in the woods is focusing on a result.

She is intense. Moving with purpose. Headphones on to drown out the sounds of the woods as they run through, oblivious to the leaves going past them on each side, steady pace, independent of terrain.

It is all about getting there.

To the 5 mile marker. To the 45 minute mark. To lose the 15 lbs or beat the last time or check off a to do box in preparation for the big race, so she can get to work, so she can pick up the kids, so she isn’t late in meeting her friend for brunch at Panera Bread.

This person is not really here in the woods.

This person of the second is in a future.

The third person I meet in the woods is meandering.

Pace inconsistent.

Stopping to take a picture of a branch that reminds her of a face. Standing off trail to absorb the expanse of the valley before her as she eats her trail mix and smells the pine and the beauty and the life.

Yes, she is moving. Yes, she will get to a there.

But getting to a there is just a side effect.

This person is in the woods.

This person is in the now.

Now, there is nothing wrong with being a person of the first or the second.

There is a time to tell stories.

We need to tell stories to pass on information, as a way to bond to our fellow humans, as a pure enjoyment of this worldly experience.

There is a time to focus.

We need to focus when we need to produce, when we need to be efficient, when we need to make sure that we actually get something done and finished and shipped.

But on that Sunday, when I embarked into those woods, I chose to be a person of the third.

And that made all the difference.

But my story of 2010 has already been memorialized in thousands of tweets, dozens of blog posts, countless texts and hugs and intimate conversations in coffeehouses and bars and kitchens and diners and hotel rooms and an deserted patio a block from the L.

Yes, 2010 was about surrender.

Embracing my femininity. Letting go to receive the amazing ecstasy that’s always in life, regardless of the crazy circumstances and stressful happenings.

But important and profound and story-filled as it was … 2010 was Yesterday.

This post is about Today.

Today I commit to be simply myself.

Today I commit to pay attention to who and what is right in front of me.

Today I commit to give up my illusion of control and to focus on the only thing I can do anything about – me.

Today I commit to my personal & business theme for 2011: Creating Space for Ecstasy via Boundaries & Self Care.

Today I commit to prioritizing my projects and focuses.

Today I commit to do one thing at a time.

Today I commit to take care of myself first.

Today I commit to my first personal project (and highest priority): getting better sleep.

Today I commit to my first business project: promoting & delivering the How to Create Your 2011 Business Plan from the Feminine class.

These are not New Year’s Resolutions or proclamations.

These are quiet, sober, decisions.

Cutting off what went before, removing the shroud of bullsh*t and standing up as who I really am. Today. Tomorrow. Forever.

As important as it is to remember and learn from yesterday, as important as it is to plan for and dream about tomorrow, I commit to remember that …

The only when I can do anything about, the only place where ecstasy lives, the only thing that’s real, is who I am Today.

So, my loves, where are you? Who are you being? Are you joining me here, in Today, showing up fully as the simple brilliance of yourself?

Shivering. Texting. Weeping.

Wondering what the nearby bonfire partygoers think of me, as I stand there alone, in the dark.

Everything was wrong. I was wrong.

I stood there, mentally writing angst filled blog posts about loneliness and isolation and guilt and such ingredients of depressing poetry and dramatic independent films.

But this is not that post.

Because after a few long text/skype conversations with intuitive friends who get me frighteningly well, after another sleepless night of overthinking and overanalyzing and overworrying, I found the truth.

Nothing is wrong.

Wrong implies that there is some way “it is supposed to be” or “I am supposed to be” and what currently is does not rise to that occasion.

But there is nothing that is supposed to be.

This is it.

There is no problem.

So last night, at 2:30 AM I laid in bed, in the dark, smiling. Laughing. About the ridiculousness of my life, about accepting who I am – my insanity and my brilliance – about what I am capable of and what I can (and must!) let others do for me.

And I realized that I forgot about the ecstasy. One of my 4 words. I’ve been living in love and courage and enlightenment, I forgot about that fourth fundamental part of who I am.

I was waiting for the ecstasy to start.

You see, last year I compartmentalized my life. On one hand, was me at home (now in San Francisco), where I run a business and am a mom and a friend and spend my time caring and creating and inspiring.

But enjoying life, living in the moment, feeling ecstasy, indulging in what I love and being just for myself … that only happened when I was traveling. On a vacation from the ordinary. Physically removed from the daily routine.

And since I stopped traveling for a few months to get my life together & launch a new program for my company, I had no ecstasy on my calendar. No journey of the soul to live for.

So, instead, I must find the ecstasy in my ordinary life.

This is not about changing anything.

It’s about awareness. Perspective. Opening my eyes and being in the now with the amazingness that’s right in front of me.

I do meaningful work every day. Inspire and help people change their businesses. Their lives. And, I get to read the blog comments and @ replies and emails they send me, sharing their transformations.

I live in a real city. Just outside my single paned glass balcony door is a world of everything to eat, do, see, share, learn. People wearing costumes for no reason or who seem to have forgotten pants. Kind people who will give up their seat on the bus or who just want to tell a story or share a moment of connection.

I have my own space. I picked this desk, this lamp, the one piece of art on my wall. Every item of clothing in my closet, the dishes in my sink, the lack of TV in my living room – those are all conscious choices made particularly for me, by me, exactly as I want them.

I am blessed with real friends. People who I can text at any hour of the day or night to share my celebrations or snarks or freakouts. Who get me, who know who I really am, who understand my insanities and know what I need to hear or do to be myself again.

I set my schedule. I wake up when I wake up, only using an alarm clock when I have to catch a plane. Doing my best work with the natural rhythms of my energy. Work late or early in the morning (well, usually both). Eat when I am hungry (well, when I remember). I can stop in the middle of the day to play with my daughter or go to the beach or watch a movie (well, when I give myself permission to).

I decide who gets my energy and attention. The time I spend with my daughter. The intimate friends I speak to on the phone, text and skype with. Who I hire to help me grow this company. What clients I agree to take on. What requests I say yes to and when I say no.

This is about the way my daughter laughs when I tickle her. The feel of the fur inside my Ugg slippers. The black current vanilla smell of the first candle I burned in my new bedroom.

This is about the taste of Ghiradelli’s dark chocolate. Eating stir-fry made in my own kitchen. Drinking a Starbuck’s triple nonfat nowhip mocha on a rainy afternoon.

This is about listening to the wind tear around buildings from my bed in the morning. Watching the fog roll out at mid day. Smelling the ocean a few moments after sunset.

This is about letting go that the way my life is – my lack of living room furniture, the dirty dishes in my sink, the unanswered emails, my idiosyncratic relationships, the uncertainties of my business and my life – letting go that my life is not the way it is supposed to be.

Because there is no “supposed to be” that I’m waiting for – this is my life.

I just need to remember to live it.

Theme Song for this post: These Are The Days by 10,000 Maniacs

So, what are you waiting for?

Here’s a secret I’ve discovered that’s making a huge difference in my life and business … and if you have any comments, questions or shares after watching this vid, please share in the comments below!